George W. Bush makes me sick

I read a blog of a woman who is going back to grad school to become a social worker. She is working with cancer patients in a very prominant hospital and recieved this email...

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Dear Colleagues,

Last week I sent information about the S-CHIP program which is due to expire on Sept 30th, the end of the federal fiscal year. Today, the House and Senate have worked out a compromise which is scheduled to be voted on this week. Once there is a consensus bill passed in the Congress, it will go to the president for his signature. President Bush continues to say that he will veto this bi- partisan, compromise bill in the name of fiscal restraint. The funding to expand the S-CHIP program by $35 billion over five years would come from 61-cent-per-pack increase in the tobacco tax. The expanded bill will cover an additional 4 million children (from 6.6 million currently covered to 10 million).
I am sending a link to the Kaiser Daily Health Policy Report for your review. If the bill is vetoed or expires on Sept 30th, millions of children will become uninsured and the patients you work with who are currently covered under your states S-CHIP program will be uninsurable if they do not qualify for Medicaid and their parents do not currently have private insurance.
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It just makes me so mad. We can spend endless amounts of money on a war that is a joke at best, but we can't spend anything to keep sick kids insured. How sad is that? Bush made a stupid decision to attack a country for something that they did not do (I'm not saying Hussein wasn't a bad guy, he is just not THE bad guy we should have gone after at that point). Now we are putting so many resources, so much money, and most importantly, so many of our soldiers into Iraq that we don't have enough of those things here when we need them.
We are one of the American families that have struggled with the insurance question. Working at a small, family run business, we don't have access to good, cheap insurance. Larry and I aren't even insured. All we can do is hope and pray we don't get sick (knock on wood). I am so scared Bush is going to screw us all out of any insurance before he leaves office. I am counting the days until the next election. I can't wait to get this man OUT OF OFFICE.
Please do not think I am "unAmerican" or not patriotic. I love my country and what we stand for. And that is exactly why I am so against Bush. He is ruining so many things that it will be so hard for whomever takes his place to correct them. I am worried about the economy, foreign relations, education, the environment, health insurance, taxes, people's right to privacy, etc.... I basically feel very let down by this administration. I CANNOT believe they were elected twice. We need someone who is more interested in the good of the whole country instead of just a small portion of it. I don't know who that will be yet, I am still doing my homework on that. In general I distrust politians, but Bush tops 'em all.
(sorry for the political rant. I just had to get it out.)

The flu just won't leave us alone! The girls and I are ok, there are just a few residual effects that I won't get into here (you're welcome!!). I was very hopeful that Larry wouldn't get it at all. He tends to get sick less then the rest of us. But last night, all of a sudden it hit him hard. So now he is sick with this stupid crud. The worst parts only lasted for about 24 hours for the rest of us and I hope it is the same for him. Get it all over with and then we can have a relaxing and recuperating weekend.

In other news, on Wednesday my sister-in-law Lesley had her sonogram and found out she is having a little boy. She really wanted a little girl I think, but she is getting excited about a boy now. I told her that after carrying the baby, laboring with the baby, and delivering the baby it could come out a rat and she would still love it and think it was adorable. So I am having a new nephew that will be named Brayden Thomas sometime in early February.

I will end this with some pictures. Have a great day and weekend!!

Here are a couple from Sedgwick County Zoo

Here we are at Rolling Hills in Salina

At the Fair!

Dance Class

The girls with my grandparents

YUCK!!!!

The flu has invaded our house with a vengeance. And I can't tell you how gross it has been. It really all started Saturday with Vanessa. She puked 5 times. I couldn't believe it at first. She is only 20 weeks old, way too young to have the flu in my opinion. At first I tried to convince myself it was just a really bad spit-up episode. I actually believed that for about a minute. Then I could see she didn't feel good and was just a little warm. Then she exploded again. All over me each and every time. It was like she waited for me to be holding her and then let it go. I was so worried about her, I called the doctor Saturday evening. We took her off the bottle and just gave her some pedialite for the night and she finally stopped the puking. But then it started coming out the other end. Then Sunday afternoon, Natalie started up with the same thing. Two little girls just as sick and gross as could be. It was not a fun weekend to say the least. Natalie took it pretty well. (When she first started feeling yucky she asked me if there was a baby in her tummy. I guess throwing up will always be associated with pregnancy in this house thanks to me. I told her there was not and she asked if there would be. I told her that maybe when she got older. Then she asked if someone would put it there. I changed the subject!!!) They are both feeling better today, except they are still having "bathroom troubles". Now I feel like shit. I haven't thrown up and hopefully I won't, but I am drained and my tummy is in knots. Thankfully I made it through their worst days while I could still function properly. Now I am pretty useless. I have managed to keep them fed (although neither of them are eating that much), and relatively clean. I can't wait until 7:30 comes around...I could really use Larry here. Let's all just hope really hard that he doesn't get sick too. I really couldn't handle that right now.

Finally, some quiet time

It has been so long since I had a minute to sit and write. We have been busy, busy, busy. It has been a very fun week though. We have had a great time and the girls have been very good (for the most part). We spent 7 hours having a great time at the fair. The only thing that we missed doing was watching the pig races. We kept forgetting about them and when we finally got over there they were over for the day. Bummer for Natalie and me! We also had Natalie's first dance class. It was SO cute. The little girls shuffled and walked like butterflies and began learning left and right. Nat had a great time and did really well. She gets distracted sometimes, but come on, she's three!
Other than being so busy our lives are pretty normal. Which is good. I am glad it's the weekend. I really enjoy it when Larry is here to spend the days with us. He helps me a lot with the girls which is a welcome relief, but we also just have a lot of fun. He is a great daddy and is very hands on and involved. I really couldn't have picked a more perfect person to have kiddos with. I know people that don't feel like that..and you better believe I appreciate the kind of father he is. My kids are my life, and feels the same way.
Well, I knew alone time couldn't last forever. Natalie just got up and is meowing to get my attention, so I think I will go play kitty cat for a while. What a great way to spend a Saturday morning!

Updates

We've been one busy little family lately, and we are only going to get busier. Fall is such a busy season for us, but I am more than ready. Bring it on!!!
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Last Friday was Vanessa's 4 month doctor appointment, just a little late. She weighs 12 pounds, 13 ounces. She is doing really well and everything looked good. It was too funny though, she kept her feet up by her mouth the whole time he was examining her. I had to literally unfold her so he could check her tummy.
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On Saturday we went up to Salina to the Rolling Hills Wildlife Adventure on a whim. We had a great time. They have a nice zoo, and a really cool museum. Natalie had a great time both places, but actually preferred the museum. She loves zoos, but we go often enough that they are not something "new". We had gone to the Sedgwick County zoo on Wednesday AND Thursday (it started raining on Wed before we were ready to leave so we went back the next day). I think we are all zooed out for a bit. At least for this week!
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Today was Nat's second day of school since last Monday was Labor Day. She had another good day according to Miss Katie. She made a neat palm tree picture and told me they read "Chicka Chicka Boom Boom". We have that book at home and read it sometimes, so she thought it was pretty cool that they were doing something at school that she did at home. When I went to pick her up I arrived a little early and watched her play on the playground for a bit. She is so cute, but I am worried about her being a loner. Three little girls were on one of the merry-go-rounds and instead of taking the fourth seat, Natalie got on another one all by herself. I am sure it is just her age and maybe a touch of shyness, but it still worries me. I am a mother....everything worries me. She did sit with some other kids when a teacher brought out some books and read to them outside. That was one of the cutest things I have ever seen. All these little kids around the teacher listening to Curious George. I am so glad she is in this program. I almost waited another year to put her in school, but now I think I would have regretted it if I did. I wish I would have gotten her in sooner truthfully. It really teaches her the social skills that can only be learned outside the house, when mommy is not around.
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This week is chalk full of fun. Tomorrow Natalie will spend the evening with her Grandparents while I go to our monthly girls night out with Mom and the gals. We are going to Pizztros (sp?) and I am excited to try something new. I would feel bad about not taking Natalie, but I know she will have so much more fun with Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Lesley and all the dogs. Wednesday Mom, Nat, Ness and I are going to the fair. I am so excited. The fair has always kind of marked the beginning of the busy fall and winter seasons for my family. One day closer to Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and all the birthdays that are clustered into the next few months. Thursday is Natalie and her friend Alexis's first dance class. They are taking Tap, Ballet, and Jazz for Tots. Don't worry.....I won't be able to resist posting pictures I am sure. We are also going to my grandparents for a dinner and dance Thursday night. A dance. Seriously. I told my mom I would go but I am absolutely positively NOT dancing. I can't even imagine how those very old people will dance, but it will probably be pretty cute....as long as I am sitting in a chair on the side!
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So, that's what's going on in our lives. Mom will be pissed that I didn't put any pics with this post, so "I'm sorry Mom, I will send you some soon. Promise!" Hope everyone else is having as much fun as we are here in Roatville.

My girl

Sometimes I just love Natalie so much I could burst.

I always love both my daughters, and I make sure they know that. But there are times, especially with Natalie since Vanessa can't even move yet, that I don't like them too much. Natalie can be a handful. She is strong willed and stubborn. She knows what she likes and she is not afraid to let you know. I am a bit out of my element with her. When I was little I was shy. Now, with my parents I was, of course, a pain in the ass. Out in public I wasn't so much. I was always afraid to be made fun of. I didn't want to be "the joke". This fear of mine brought me to think I was being made fun of constantly. I tried desperately to not do anything that made could be mocked, ridiculed, and/or laughed at. God forbid if anyone laugh at me. I honestly couldn't even laugh at myself. Looking back, it is kind of sad that I grew up feeling like this. I can think of so many incidents where I could have had real fun if I would have let myself. My parents pushed me gently to be more outgoing. I just couldn't. Simple as that.

I remember times at school were I was beyond mortified, and I am most definitely the ONLY one who remembers them at all. I obsessed for years, literally, about the time in 5th grade that I pronounced it "bo constrictor" instead of boa. A few kids laughed and corrected me. They weren't mean or anything. But I still remember it. I grew out of this debilitating fear around 8th grade. I came out of my shell so to speak.


Natalie is not, and has never been, like this. She jumps in head first and has a blast doing it. She is not afraid to make a mistake, she just goes for it. I admire this. She has a lot of fun in her life. While I do think she has the right idea about life, it makes it more difficult for me. She is always on the go when we are out. She is a leader and will be the first to run and do. This wasn't so bad before Vanessa, but now it is very hard to keep up with her while lugging around an infant. So I try to reign her in....and she gets mad. Another thing she is not shy about is showing her feelings in public. She could care less if there are people around when she tells me I am a "stupid mommy", or when she throws a screaming, kicking, completely out-of-control fit. And I try my best to stop the fit while also teaching her that she doesn't get her way when she acts like that. It is embarrassing at times, and I have had to deal with that. As much as I have always hated being embarrassed it has been quite a task to realize I am not the only women to have her daughter yell at her in public and that the majority of people aren't looking at me with disdain, but rather with a sense of "been there, done that".

Nat is basically a very good girl. She plays nicely with her friends, she is gentle with animals, she has good manners, she loves her family and lets us all know, and she is extremely smart. She is three-years-old though, and I am a firm believer that the terrible threes are a lot worse then the terrible twos. They just have another year of experience to play off of. One more year of studying how to manipulate mom, how to push mom's buttons.

Because of all this I really appreciate the times, like last night, when she is so loving and good. When she is playing with her dolls, giving them hugs and kisses and being such a great nurturer. When she goes in the bathroom, shuts the door, and I hear her excited little voice say "I DID IT" when she finally realizes that it is not so bad to poop in the potty instead of a pull-up. When the only people she wants to celebrate with when she accomplishes something is her mom and dad. When she comes and crawls up on to my lap, kisses my cheek and says "I just love you so much mommy". I do too baby, more then you will ever, ever know.

Dream On

I have been having the weirdest, most vivid dreams lately. It is kind of driving me crazy. I tend to dream more and remember them when my sleep is disrupted or I'm not getting enough. Vanessa is really good at making sure I'm not getting enough sleep! Last night she woke up laughing and giggling at 1:30 and stayed up until about 3:30. I will tell you I tried everything to get her back to sleep, but she was ready to play. I finally plopped her in her swing with her blanket and watched a movie (The Whole Nine Yards was on tv, I don't love that movie, but it's better then anything else on at that time in the morning). Then Natalie woke up every fifteen to twenty minutes for an hour and a half. I think she might have woke up when I was putting Vanessa back down and then couldn't get back to sleep right. And what do you do when that happens? Call for mama of course. I was bringing her drinks of water, covering and recovering her, making sure the moon was still outside, finding Mercedes, her Cabbage Patch baby that she sleeps with, and basically running back and forth between our rooms. So, when I did get to sleep I started dreaming crazy again. I mentioned yesterday I had a dream about my uncle. Last night I was dreaming about this mean girl I have not seen or even thought of since college. She was in every dream I had. Weird!! I really need some good, uninterrupted sleep. Try telling my kids that though.