Hi. My name is Loni and I'm a nail-biter.

Click. ClickClick. Click. ClickClickClick.

That was the sound of me biting my nails. I have been a nail-biter for as long as I can remember. I have also wanted to quit biting my nails for as long as I can remember. It's gross. It's stupid looking. It's just something I really don't want to do anymore.

Usually it is a totally unconscious action. When I am bored or being impatient I find myself gnawing away. But it is also a coping mechanism. When I am mad, or sad, or nervous, or uncomfortable I bite. It really does help me calm down. I guess it is kind of my security blanket in a way. Something that is always there for me when I need it.

But I am so ready to not have that security anymore. In the last twenty years I have tried everything I could think of to try to stop chewing on my hands. I have used the yucky tasting nail polish, I have put band-aids on the fingers I tend to chew on the most, I have gotten wonderful expensive manicures with fake fingernails. None of these things worked even a little bit. I got used to the polish (I was not proud of that) and I chewed on the fake nails until they came off and then I continued chewing on my nails. I thought that I could quit when I got engaged because I wanted to show off my ring and I HATE showing people my hands. But no, I just found a way to show my ring without drawing attention to my grotesque fingernails.

I am embarrassed by my hands. I am embarrassed when I find myself biting in public. I am just plain embarrassed. I don't want this addiction anymore (it is way past a habit now). Got any ideas for me? I am open to suggestions!